Tuesday, November 9, 2010

A bit of an update

First, let's just say that I've been working now for 3 months and I have JUST NOW realized that I can spend money on myself! How insane is that? So, I spent 2 hours shopping online for the best deal on a new pair of Uggs. Real Uggs. Uggs that cost me $180! But Uggs that I will appreciate for many many years. I also broke down and spent a bit of my earnings on others, because I'm just nice like that.

Alrighty, so I've been sick. I'm not dying or anything, but I am missing out on important things due to my contagiousness. I've been on antibiotics now for a solid month, and I'm pretty sure my stomach loathes my doctors, which just so happen to know me by name now. It's a little bit embarrassing to walk in and have two people say, "you're back again?" Ya, like I want to be bitch! I could understand the tude if I was coming in just because, but I've had legit illnesses.

Here's little rundown on how I was diagnosed with Helicobacter pylori, just in case you were interested....


Doctor: "Hi I'm Dr. Biatch, what seems to be the problem?"

Me: "I've been having crazy stomachaches for the past 2 months and I'm not sure why."

Doctor: "Have you been to any other countries recently?"

Me: "Nope"

Doctor: "Could you possibly be pregnant?"

Me: (laughing) "Ya right!"

Doctor: "Well you don't seem to have any symptoms related to anything I've ever heard of."

Me: (Beginning to feel like I might be crazy.)

Doctor: (Condescendingly) "Well, I COULD run some tests, but umm..... have you ever thought about being on anxiety medication?"

Me: (Really thinking I'm crazy now) "Um, not really. Do I seem like I should be? I mean, (here comes the part where I start saying what I'm thinking and actually DO seem crazy) I do get pretty wound up when I'm driving in the insane traffic every day. I'm exhausted all the time. I work full time, go to school time, then come home to run a house full time. Maybe that's why I feel sick all the time?"

Doctor: (Looking at me as if I'm a whiny child which included the pouted lip) "How about we prescribe you some anti-anxiety meds okay? And call it a day?"

Me: (Sobbing...I mean SOBBING UNCONTROLLABLY) "Can we please run some tests just in case?"

Doctor: "Ya, I guess"

She walked out of the room and I straightened up realizing the beezy had just got to me. This was the only time in my life that I prayed the blood test came back with something. I needed to prove to myself AND the doctor that I was not in fact crazy, but really sick.

10 minutes go by, she walks in with a sour look on her face.

Doctors: "Well, looks like you have H. Pylori."

Me: (I won! I won! Omg, what the fuck is H. Pylori! Omg, am I dying?!?!) "What's H. Pylori??"



And the rest is history. All in all, I'm not dying BUT the medications kicked my butt for 22 days. What's even more crazy is not even a week later and I ended up with Strep throat. So now I'm on antibiotics for another 8 days. Yipee!




I obviously have tons to catch everyone up on, but for now it's time to do some homework.

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